Dear Younger Me, Life Edition

If you are a fan of the Christian band Mercy Me, that title just rang a bell, and you may have an earworm for the rest of your weekend. You are welcome. If you have never heard it, here ya go: Dear Younger Me. Again, you are welcome.

Even if you do not know or like the song, the concept is pretty easy to figure out: If I knew then what I know now, what would I tell 5-years-younger me? 10-years younger? 25-years-younger?

Looking up the song, I also learned that this type of letter writing is actually a pretty common therapy technique, which makes a lot of sense. But I am not here today to walk you through my deep, and occasionally dark, relationship with myself. Mostly I am just here, marking time during a pandemic that has much of the world in a tailspin, and a lock-down. But if I could go back to tell myself some things a few (or more) years ago, what would I say?

I might tell High-School Me that the first boy I kissed was not that great a guy, and that the guy I always wanted to kiss was not my dream guy either.

I might tell One-Semester-of-College Me that I do go back someday, and that it is much more fun. 

I might tell Wedding-Night Me that this is the real thing, but that it will be harder than I ever could have imagined. 

I might tell Pre-Mom Me that happy and healthy is way better than skinny.

I might tell New-Mom Me that it IS hard, and it IS bad right now, but it WILL get better.  

I might tell the Me that went to therapy for the first time with postpartum depression after my second child was born that it is okay to tell the therapist everything. It would not be the first (or the last) time he or she heard that story, and this is how you get through it.

I might tell Just-Gave-My-Life-to-Christ Me that this is going to be a good, but hard journey, and that my non-believing husband would one day be an elder in a solid, Bible-based church.

I might tell Back-to-College-With-Two-Young-Children Me to have more fun. I mean, still be a good wife and mom, but have more fun...and try not to feel so guilty about it.

I might tell Went-to-Work-Without-Getting-My-Teaching-Degree Me that it is ok. I teach all the time...not in the way I had imagined, but I teach just the same...and I love it, just like I thought I would. 

I might just skip ahead here, and tell 2014 Me that the next few years are going to be a nightmare, but in the end, you will have a job you love, you will learn to laugh with your husband all over again, and there will be a pandemic that makes you a little fearful of grocery shopping. 

It is a mixed bag, thinking about going back, is it not? When I think it all through in this way, I wonder if I would actually go back, if that were something I could do. Would you? Do you think Younger You would believe you...?

Hey! Younger, Non-Knitting Me! You will become obsessed with knitting impossibly small things, toy rabbits and anything ridiculous that you can find! 

:::crickets, in Younger-Me's time:::

Yeah. That's what I thought would happen. So, rather than worry about it today, I am going to go knit a sweater that I don't have enough yarn for, in a gauge it is not written for, at a size that should not fit and see what happens. Perhaps I should write a "Dear Younger Me, Knitting Edition" post... Ha!

Thanks for stopping by friends, and Knit in Good Health!