Saturday, January 30, 2016

Writing...

When I was a younger gal, I thought I'd write a book.
I figured, "I know how to write!, so why not take a look
at what things I could write, funny, smart or sporty?
I'm sure that I can finish by the time that I am 40!"

Well, 40 came and went, and I did not have a book to publish. I do, however, have a few short narratives on life...my life, to be specific...and I've heard it said, "Smoke 'em, if you got 'em!" Couple this with the fact that there aren't many new details on the knitting front, and the fact that I recently shared a small portion of this story with a friend who laughed until she peed (we were in the ladies room anyway...lol!), it seems only natural to share part of my book with you today! 

Here is chapter 4, finished in the spring of 2002, and also known as

Bunny Slippers and Granny Curlers—
There was a time that I thought I had it all together.  I was 13.  My parents were idiots.  Boy!  Did that come back to bite me in the butt!  You see, I am now the proud parent of a 13-year-old. 

I have always maintained that having children does cause a slight loss of sanity. . .as a matter of fact, I believe that memory loss can be directly linked to the number of children a woman has.  After all, before I had children, I could go to the grocery store without a list, and I could remember to pay the bills before the past due announcement arrived.  Now it’s all I can do to remember that ketchup does not count as a vegetable, and bunny slippers are not adequate outdoor shoes during an Ohio winter. 

I used to think it was no big deal.  I’d wear the slippers out to get the mail or to sweep the snow from the front stoop.  These are quick activities, and I knew that once I got inside I could slip off the wet, fuzzy slippers and put my feet near the heater.  However, I soon found myself wearing the flimsy foot coverings on longer excursions.

I finally realized that I had crossed the line when my son, then 12, looked at me in the car on the way to school and said, “Um. . .are you planning to go inside when you drop me off today, Mom?”  Well, in my defense, I was not.  But as I considered his question, I realized why he asked.  From the hot rollers in my hair to the moth-eaten (but still warm) house sweater, to the flannel jammie pants and, of course, slippers on my feet, I was not dressed to be out of the house.

“No, I’m just going to drop you off.  Did you want me to come in?”
“No,” he answered.  “Umm. . .could you let me out here?  I can just walk the last block.”

“How did this happen to me?,” I thought as I looked at myself in the mirror after I got home.  I used to have so much fashion sense that other people would ask my opinion about coordinating their wardrobe.  I used to set trends!  But, somewhere between the wedding ring and my children’s pre-teen years, I seem to have lost my mind!  In case you are thinking, “Oh, that’s nothing!  All moms go through the slippers and curlers in public stage,” consider the following day:

9:00am-I arrive at work, ready for the day. . .as soon as I stop in the ladies’ room; 9:05-the phone rings and the trip down the hall is postponed; 9:15-three messages taken, I’d better check the voice mail; 9:45-I realize I still haven’t been to the bathroom, I’ll go on my way down the hall to give the boss his letter; 10:15-three more phone calls have come in with immediate requests, the letter is still on my desk and I’m thirsty; 10:16-get a glass of water and drop off the letter, the phone rings; 10:17-run back to the office to get the phone because I am expecting an important return call; 10:18-tactfully release myself from the grip of a telemarketer; 10:20-notice that I haven’t filed the petty cash receipts; 10:30-did I drink all that water already?  I’ll get more in a minute; 11:00-Wow!  I still haven’t been to the ladies’ room, and I don’t know how much longer I can make it; 11:01-UPS guy is at the door, receive packages and deliver to the waiting parties in the building; 11:15-girlfried calls to see if I’d like to go to lunch; 11:30-she’ll be here any minute, I’d better hit that restroom.

Let me just pause for a moment here to say that, during a busy day, I have a lot of sympathy for the potty-training two-year-old who forgets to tell someone she has to go until it is too late!  After two-and-a-half hours, I had still not been to the restroom, and I had added 16 ounces of cool water to the mix.  I knew I had better go soon, or I’d end up embarrassing myself!  So, I clocked out and headed down the hall.

Until I locked the stall door behind me, I did not realize how badly I truly had to go.  I grabbed my skirt to hike it up, but it wouldn’t budge.  I started to panic.  “What’s going on here?!,” I thought, “I have to go bad!  I’m not going to make it. . .”  As I continued to tug at the skirt, I got more and more flustered, and closer and closer to overflowing.  “This skirt is so loose!  Why won’t it come up?!,” I nearly shouted out loud.  In desperation, I looked down to see where I could tear the garment so that it would be easily repairable once I returned to my office.  I WAS WEARING PANTS!!! 

Disaster averted, I reversed tactics, yanked those loose-fitting trousers down and was able to go to lunch dry.  Didn’t even need the emergency sewing kit.  Whew!  That was close!

Well, for those of you who need an explanation, this is the best that I’ve got: With each child born, I propose that a certain amount of brain cells are lost.  These are probably the cells that contain information about fashion sense, common sense, and the memory of the pain of childbirth.  I theorize that these cells are actually dislocated during pregnancy to the placenta, and then lost in the afterbirth immediately following delivery of a baby, but that has yet to be proven.  The more babies you have, the more brain cells you lose.  Skeptical?  How many moms do you know, with more than one child, that still have all their mental faculties in tact beyond the age of thirty-five? 

OK, perhaps it’s not the afterbirth, as I have also known adoptive moms to have this kind of mental difficulty.  Perhaps it is more environmental.  Maybe the gradual loss of sanity and memory are due to overexposure to “O”-shaped spaghetti and sugar-laden cereal.  Mind you, I have not done any official research yet, but when I do, I’ll let you know what I find out.

For now, though, we’ll just have to be content to acknowledge the problem.  Isn’t that half the battle anyway?  Then, we can give it to God each morning with a simple prayer:

“Lord, I love you.  I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, according to Your design.  I don’t understand why You designed me the way You did, but I am thankful for each moment of each day that You have given to me.  Because I am sooo human, I pray that You will follow after me today.  Pick up the pieces when I am broken, give me the wisdom to look to You when I forget what I am doing and where I am going, and give me the strength to continue when I am discouraged.  Be my constant companion, and help me to glorify You in all I do, even when I leave the house in granny curlers and bunny slippers.  In Jesus’ name I pray.  Amen.”
 ---------------------------------------
So there you have it. A little look into the crazy that once made me want to write a book...a long time ago. I'd like to say that I am better about waiting until I am dressed to leave the house and "answering the call of nature" in a timely fashion these days. I'd like to say that, but the truth is that I still goof up on both of these fronts, often distracted by the compulsion to knit "just one more row." It's really only a matter of time until I truly DO embarrass myself (or someone else)...please pray for me.

Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Experimental Update

The Experimental Sweater is coming right along, so I thought I'd pop in to let you know how it's going. First of all, I love the way the variegated yarn is creating vertical, wavy lines of light and dark. 

Second, I love the fabric...a little lace, a little texture...yum!...and the drape is fantastic! Third, 6 rows into skein #4, the length is just about 16", which is further than I thought I'd be at this point...which means that I may be able to have a wider border, and/or a small sleeve...the possibilities are so exciting!

Lastly...if I am already at 16", the body of this sweater is way past halfway done. This may be the most exciting part of all! (Squeee!) In fact, it's probably too exciting for the average weekday morning, so I will stop writing here, and get on with this Wondrous Wednesday! 

Thanks for stopping by! I hope that your Wednesday is Wonderful, and that all of your experimental knitting ends in success!

Knit in Good Health!

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Islands of Color

"Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat'...," said Steven Wright, and this got me thinking... What book would Pretty bring? Probably something with knitting patterns and humor. Maybe "How to Make Knitting Needles With Just About Anything," or, "The Art of Spinning, With or Without the Proper Tools." After all, if I were on a desert island, I would need some knitting to pass the time...and maybe a cat.

Speaking of islands, I am currently spending a good chunk of my knitting time on Christmas Island. It's the color of my newest sock yarn (from Simply Socks Yarn Company), and it is so very bright and fun! I have added in a simple feather and fan style pattern, and these socks are sure to be a highlight of my wardrobe in the next Christmas season! 

They are so fun, that I am actually considering giving them a wear before next December...we will see. When I start into the knitting, I can barely stop. I knitted 20 rows just this morning, and I would still be going if there weren't laundry and dishes to do! 

Alas, I am not stranded on an island, and there is work to be done...but I look forward to revisiting these socks, or maybe the experimental sweater, or perhaps I will cast on something new! I have some 716 Yarn that I am just itching to knit up, but I have not picked a pattern yet. What will it be, what will it be???

Whatever it is, I am sure you will hear about it here! Be sure to stop back every week for more fun knitting, frequent family updates and the occasional opinion post. I look forward to your comments!

Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Experimental Sweater

Sometimes when I knit, I like to have a pattern to tell me what to do next. But sometimes, especially when I am stash-diving to use up previously purchased yarn for my next project, I am unsuccessful in locating a pattern that will make what I want to make with the amount of any given yarn that I happen to have on hand. It is at this point that I start to experiment...as I have with my Six Dollar Experimental Sweater.

I bought the yarn (Bobby Jean, by Loops & Threads, sadly discontinued) on an expedition to Michael's at some point in the not too distant past...I am sure it has been less than two years. I only found 6 skeins in this color (priced at just under $1 each in the clearance bin), so my yardage is limited, but I'd like something tunic length. This means no sleeves, and I am good with that, but I was quite unsuccessful in finding a pattern that I really wanted to start.

Sooo, I looked up my favorite pattern generator (by KnittingFool.com), and chose the correct size...but my guage was off at 4.5sts/in, rather than 5sts/in. Not that I made a gauge swatch, mind you, but I know my general gauge with worsted or light worsted on size 8 needles, so I made an assumption which turned out to be not half bad! 9 inches into the body of the thing, my gauge is indeed 4.5sts/in! Go me!

If the math holds up, and considering that I was at 9 inches before the second skein was finished, I should be ok. I will need about 18 inches before I split for the armholes, so I should get there in 4 skeins, and this will leave me with 2 skeins for the upper front and back (another 8-9 inches, but fewer stitches), plus a little border around the armholes and neckline...cross your fingers! This one is going to be a bit of a crap-shoot! lol! Stay tuned, and I promise to report the results, win or lose...I promise! Who knows? Maybe I am secretly a designer...

Have you done any experimental knitting? How did it turn out? Will you do it again?

Yes or no, good or bad, yes or no...thanks for stopping by! I wish you all the best in your knitting, and also that you will Knit in Good Health!

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Post-Visit Blues

Well, Happy Saturday to you! Friday was a busy day for the Pretties, as the kids left to travel back to their home, several states away. The end of a visit, whether here or there, is always a little bittersweet. First, there is the good-bye to the sweetest little girls I know...

Then the tears, and the re-adjust...for the last 16 days, my house has looked like this:

Which is great (even when wrangling cats and dogs together)! Every time I look at the floor, or step around a toy, my heart leaps for joy that we can be their home for a short time. Even though it interrupts my routine, and I often stress at that, I am glad to make that sacrifice. There is no better feeling than coming home to open arms, smiling tots and a happy family that is well-loved!

While they were here, we celebrated a first birthday, complete with cuppy-cakes and cookies,

went with them to visit grandparents (Sweetie's parents' house),

and generally had a pretty good time watching them size up each family member and figure out each one's place in her life! Here's Peanut, sizing up the relatives who ate vegetables with her at her sister's party...

Yesterday was the re-set of the house, which makes it feel even more empty...kindof like the after-Christmas letdown I feel when I put the tree and all the trappings away. Sweetie and I busied ourselves with the vacuuming, putting away of toys, rearranging of furniture and mounds of laundry...which are mostly finished. And this morning, there was the normal stillness, full of cats and yarn and lovely memories of the visit.

As we head into the weekend, I am sure we will find evidence of their visit in unexpected places...a bottle cap under the sofa, the last of the stacking cups under the TV stand, some fingerprints on the door frames, banana body wash in the shower... Oh, the memories! This is the very spot we sat in while I read Little House on the Prairie to Peanut...minus the cats...lol! (That's cwazy, Gwamma," she said to me as we read the last few chapters. "That's cwazy that the person who wrote the book is IN the book! That's cwazy!," she said, shaking her blonde curls.) The cats spent a LOT of the visit hiding under the sofa! Now it's just me and the meow-ers...still and content. 

What's in store for your weekend? Will there be knitting? If not yarn and crafts, I hope that you will have time to do whatever it is that you love to do. As for me and my house, we will be missing the kids and celebrating the love!

Thanks for stopping by today, and Knit in Good Health!

PS - If you are looking for the knitting in this post, it's there...in a birthday shrug for Sweet Pea, with a matching shrug for Peanut, and of course the experimental sweater across my lap and the cat. 

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Powerball?

Well, how about a Puzzle Ball instead?

I will have to admit that these projects are a couple weeks old, and I am rushed for time to write even these few words...but if you have littles and you crochet, this is a GREAT project! You start with three sections that look like this when they are finished...

Then you fit them together, wiggling and turning, until you have a powerball of your very own!

Don't feel intimidated...the project is really pretty easy! Give it a whirl!

No whirling for me the next couple of days, though...only a few more precious visits with my grand-littles before they head home...sniff! I'm going to make the best of it!

Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!

Saturday, January 9, 2016

B is for...

Bathtime Baby...

Beading...

Birthday bites...

This blog post brought to you by the letter "B," and a busy, busy Pretty!

Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

My Super Power

If you could have one super power, what would it be? You've heard that question, right? I know that I have, and you know what? I have a super power! I'm not sure why this is my super power, but there is no denying that this is the one I've got...my super power is putting kids to sleep! Just feast your eyes on Exhibit 2...

(Exhibit 1 is in my last blog post...)

I am thankful for my super power at the end of a long day, when the visiting grandchildren are over tired, over sugared (they are at Gramma's house, after all) and over stimulated. I am also thankful that I can summon the power in the middle of the day from time to time. The naps don't usually last long, so I'm opting for tiny projects this week. Here's one now!

Little socks for a little, big-sister-to-be! No, no, no, no, no! Mindy isn't pregnant again! But another friend of mine, a mommy with a one-year-old of her own, is anxiously awaiting the arrival of a little sister this month! And since there are already Daddy socks, Mommy socks, and Baby booties in this yarn (knit last year, while Mommy and Daddy were expecting that big-sister-to-be), there simply must also be Big Sister socks! This time with PINK heels and toes!

Now I'm off to work, and just dreaming of the knitting I may get to do this evening...or I may not. There's no telling where they will be or who will be awake when I get home, and if there's a choice between yarn and cuddle-y granddaughters, the girls will win every time! :^) It's true, what they say...they are only small for a season, and I plan to soak up every minute of it that I can!

Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!

Saturday, January 2, 2016

Jolly New Year!

For the new year, I have house guests. :) Therefore, there has not been much knitting...however, I finished some fairly jolly socks on December 29th! Here they are:

I hope that 2016 is starting strong for you, and that you will find moments to Knit in Good Health! I apologize for the short post, but sleeping babies are the perfect opportunity to cast on a few stitches, so I am off to do just that right now!

A Jolly New Year to you all!