Did you ever have a terrible thought? You know, you're just going along, everything seems great, then Bam! A terrible thought enters your headspace, and you realize that it only takes a moment for things to change drastically.
What if that driver loses control and swerves into my lane?
What if I didn't lock the back door before I came to bed?
What if my friends really are laughing at me, and not with me?
What if I don't have all the answers?
What if I'm just not good enough?
No? You don't have those thoughts? It's just me then? Hmph. I don't believe you. I think we all have a terrible thought once in awhile. Maybe yours are more along the lines of things you think you could get away with, or things you'd like to do (if only these things were not illegal).
Terrible thoughts come in all shapes and sizes, and some of them unfortunately turn into terrible actions. If you are the victim of those actions, they seem to come out of nowhere, and can leave you battered and bruised in many ways. If you are the "actor," you still may bear self-inflicted wounds as a result. We have likely all done things, or said things, that we regret in response to a terrible thought.
So, what do you do with that? What do you do when you have been hurt? What do you do when you have hurt someone (including yourself)? How do you recover from the terrible thought?
First, acknowledge it, and allow yourself time to feel the feels. Too many times we rush ourselves past painful feelings, sweeping them under the rug, only to trip on them later. Give yourself a minute...an hour...a day...or longer...to feel it and figure out next steps.
When you are hurt by someone else, even if they have not apologized for the offense, forgive. Holding grudges only hurts the holder. Now, I am not necessarily suggesting that you declare, "I forgive you!," with a smiley face to that person. In fact, depending on the injury, you may never talk to him or her again. Still, you have the power to forgive, let go, and move on, as a wiser person. If you do this well, you will not likely be hurt in this way again, because you will have learned how to judge this kind of character.
Lastly, if you are hurting yourself, stop. Whether your thoughts are leading you to negative self-talk, or thoughts of physically harming yourself (or someone else), just stop. As a thinker of terrible thoughts, especially about myself, I know that this advice seems trite and impossible. I know that you may not know how to stop, and in this case you must get help. I won't dwell here, for I have talked about this in other posts, but you must not hurt yourself verbally or otherwise. Email me at PrettyKnittyJewelry [at] yahoo [dot] com if you have nowhere to go for help. I will help you find the care you need to stop hurting yourself.
Why all this terrible thought talk? This is normally such a Pretty blog...
It is a yarn thing. Ever since I learned how to make yarn (side bar - I MAKE YARN!!!), I am called by the siren song of fiber waiting to be spun into beautiful yarn! My latest fiber acquisition is named "A Terrible Thought," but the yarn I have made is anything but terrible.
A luscious two-ply in happy pinks, corals and orange, with a thread of dark brown and gray (the terrible thought) running through it. I have been spinning this for the last two blog posts, and I have often let my mind wander during the spin time...how many terrible thoughts have I let get away from me? Plenty. But spinning this yarn has led me to let go of some of those thoughts and share with you. Oh, and the yarn has turned out so pretty, even despite the terrible thought running through it!
Our lives can and should be beautiful, because we are God's masterpieces! He has created us to live out loud, to experience joy, and to share our lives with other masterpieces! If you are not treasuring yourself and others, you are missing out. So, join me in being kind to one another, and to yourself. It is what you were made to do!
Thanks for stopping by, and Knit in Good Health!